When writing any kind of communication (briefing document, letter, brochure), consider a list such as this to review and improve your materials.
- Are we alive and exciting—or boring and dull?
- Have we stressed the personal approach in tone relative and proportionate to their giving level?
- Are we selling the sizzle or the steak? Are we promising benefits instead of touting our mission, core values, vison?
- Have we gotten to the heart of the matter quickly or are we beating around the bush?
- Have we singled out our reader to make him/her feel unique? NOTHING in fundraising should make a donor feel they are one of thousands except for the donor wall.
- Does the document use postscripts and headlines? They are the two most often read parts of a sales letter!
- Does the entire package, including envelope, enclosure and return card, meet the “Fresh Eggs and Flying Lessons” test? That is, does the artwork give a feeling opposite to the copy? Do the numbers not connect with the public balance sheet?
- Are there any contradictions? Test the numbers versus the words.
- Did we clearly ask for the donation? Did we do so several times?
- Assuming our donor wants to do it, is the donation form a mystery? Is there a place for pledges as well as cash? What logic was used in ordering the credit card list?
- Are there words prospects or donors won’t understand?
